To Those Lame 25 Questions Forwards People Keep Sending Me

Because there’s hundreds of these in my mailbox, here are some things about me (culled from the best of the worst forwards):

1. What’s your favourite thing to do?: Curse those that send lame e-mail forwards with voodoo hexes. It’s amazing how much blood pours from the head of a virgin goat.

2. Is there something purple within five feet of you?: Only the bruised face of somebody I know who sent me an e-mail forward.

3. Current Disappointments?: I haven’t bludgeoned anyone who’s forwarded a vain, self-effacing question list today. However, I just got up.

4. What came first, the chicken or the egg?: A disgusting half-egg/half-chicken creature gnawing on the skull of fools that waste their time with circular logic problems.

5.What do you want people to remember about you when you die?: That I gave their e-mail addresses to shady internet ponzi schemes because they felt they needed to share more of themselves with me. Who’s sharing now? A militant Nigerian sharing your banking information with his associates in various terrorist organizations. NSA will be taking you to your new summer camp in Guantanamo Bay shortly after reading this sentence for supporting the War on Freedom. Enjoy.

Sincerely,

Fergis T. McGillicuddy

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12 comments on “To Those Lame 25 Questions Forwards People Keep Sending Me

  1. webreakdigg says:

    We are going to break digg, so check out the blog and see if you want to be part of Webreakdigg.

  2. fergis says:

    Hmm. It sounds interesting enough…but I’m not sure if I’m your man. Breaking things is fun, however I enjoy writing letters more. Will writing letters break digg? And if so, will digg seek vengeance?

  3. c.trinity says:

    Now a question from me:
    What do you secretly wish to be for one day?
    You are funny!

  4. gothgeisha says:

    Here’s a question…what does god look like? AT least the way you perceive it/him/her. I’ve been asking that a lot lately.

  5. Razgriz says:

    I love number five. I absolutely adore it. Besides that, that’s exactly how I feel about the 25 question chain letters. Bravo, bravo.

  6. Jesse says:

    Lol I’ve been asked most if not all of those questions.

    And I couldn’t have said it better myself.

    People should come up with more original questions!

  7. Mr Angry says:

    Well done. Now I know how to respond the next time I get one of those damn things.

  8. Just found your blog today as it was featured on the Word Press Best Blogs list. Anyway, great answers to those lame questions. Better not join MySpace because there are seemingly hundreds of those bulletins around!

  9. Anna Lee says:

    what kinda of site is this? Whjo kills young goats for voodoo? you are sick, evil and wrong

  10. fergis says:

    Um…A funny site maybe. Sick and wrong, sure…I’m not evil. Evil is relative Anna Lee.

    Read some Vonnegut. He explores this in darkly humourous ways.

  11. Brooke says:

    nothing at all. DOG YOU ROCK! LELAND IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    HOT!!!!!!! I CAN’T KEEP MY EYES OFF HIM!!!

  12. fergis says:

    You’ve got shit for brains.

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