To Daylight Savings Time

The clock says the time is 3:06 A.M. It’s not 3:06 A.M. I know the correct time is 2:06 a.m.

I stayed up tonight to watch the magical hour of two o’clock disappear because some people in suits (probably men) decided it would save on energy and make people generally more productive. This was decided a long time ago when most people lived on farms. I’m understand this.

The problem is this year Daylight Savings Time kicks in three weeks early and leaves a week later than usual. Some people might say, “Fergis, it’s going to happen sooner or later. Why not suck it up and get up early?”

Sleep is incredibly precious to me. When I have problems sleeping I mope around the letter-writing shack all day, nursing bourbon on ice, sometimes rocking gently back and forth. Rational thought is difficult. Writing is impossible. An extra month of daylight savings will undoubtably throw me into a foul funk that will render me a terrible individual to be around (more so than usual).

It is not surprising I’ve chosen to boycott the change. I’ll set my clock forward three weeks from now. Until then I’ll go to work at the correct time…my co-workers will be exactly one hour early as far as I’m concerned.

Please reader, join me in the wonderous fields of reality. That hour didn’t disappear. It was simply ignored by the greedheads that rule the world from their frozen castle in Antarctica. Boycott the new Daylight Savings Regime!

Sincerely,

Fergis T. McGillicuddy

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