Dear Britney Spears’ Crotch

You’ve been hanging out lately. That’s cool I guess. I hang out when I’m at home. It’s no big deal though. I don’t have photographers trying to snap pictures of me exiting vehicles. Plus, I don’t normally wear skirts out in pubic. Uh…I mean public.

Sincerely,

Fergis T. McGillicuddy

PS: Tell the rest of your body to go easy on the post-natal Mojitos.